I’ve never understood why it’s seen as an insult to call someone a cocksucker. Personally, I take it as compliment. For me it’s one of the more noble pastimes one can pursue, helping out your fellow man in times of need. Honestly, why would you ever feel the need to disrespect the ones that are giving so much pleasure to the world?

It’s rather hypocritical really, as who doesn’t like to be on the receiving end of a phenomenal bout of fellatio? I happily admit to worshipping this particular part of the male anatomy. Indeed, I’m considerably fond of mine. It’s true that they do have a mind of their own, even if their thinking is perhaps not the most sound. Admittedly, it does take a while to get used to their disturbing tendency to move about on their own, and get excited in the most inappropriate of places, but I dare say that I’m not the only man to have been lead astray by the insistent needs of his manhood.

Strangely, despite being bombarded with hundreds of images on a daily basis – thank you social media – I never tire at looking at them. I’m not saying that all cocks are beautiful because quite frankly they aren’t. Like their owners, they come in all sorts of sizes and flavours, and I must admit to sampling as many as I could get my hands on over the years. I’ve encountered some you’d happily die for just for a taste, where your mouth begins to water at the thought of that deliciously dripping precum – or maybe that’s just me. Then there have been others so unappealing that they have made me question my sexual orientation – well maybe only briefly.


Of course, there is much discussion on what constitutes an acceptable appendage but generally my only concern is their cleanliness. If I want to munch on some cheese I will go buy some nice chèvre frais at the markets, thank you very much. Granted, I do prefer them in their natural uncut glory – don’t get me started on the barbarity of circumcision – but I will happily accept all reasonable offers.

I am a firm believer in the full service option where one tends to the needs of the entire area and not solely the shaft. If you’re going down there, to do a job, then you might as well give it your all. I can’t stand those boys that pop down give a few half-hearted slurps and expect you to be grateful. If the recipient of your attentions isn’t grasping at the back of your head and making all sorts of blissful noises then you’re not doing it right. Tease the head, massage those balls, nibble that perineum…it’s called foreplay for a reason – have fun with it!

After all, doesn’t everyone deserve a happy ending?

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